Almost a month ago I was writing about a new jorney in my life. Visiting the city of Seattle with my sister. Since that day I have met beautiful and caring people that have recieved me like if i were part of their family. I have enjoyed living in a city with long days and short nights. But everything has an ending…
My trip is about to end and I am about to face one of many of my “personal challenges” going on an airplane by myself. So today I write to you with pain in my chest and tearfull eyes about what happened today, the day I was supposed to leave.
I had never told anyone that I felt insecure about going on that plane back home, i always tried to hide it but today it was impossible to. As I was speaking to my dad about how much I wanted to stay , my sister said that she couldn’t cancel the flight. So I was playing cool, but my sister knows ( and I hate that she knows) when i start to feel “sensible” about something so she starts to say ” look she wants to cry”, I denied it but she kept going and eventually……I did cried like the baby I am, then I confessed everything…. And so did my sister about how she DID cancelled the flight. I felt weak and I just hatted myself for being son coward. My dad of course looked at me with those mercyfull eyes. He calmed me down and said ” I wish I was there to hold you”. I felt worst, because I am supposed to act mature, I am supposed to be confident and the truth is that I know I am not…. I am childish, and I keep trying to be what i am supposed but sometimes ls hard.
A while later I read a book, and the following quotes really got me.
( Just erase the “go to school” part)
Sorry for the dramatic posts but…. Thats just the way I can just take everything out.
Dedicated to my dad, who always worries and cares for his little girl.